That's the secret to virgins: blizzards.
It would be worth it to see how drunk he is right now.
He cartwheeled into the side of the neighbor's garage.
Ok, i'm coming over
Should I have kids to fix a relationship??
Sometimes I forget to take my socks off when I masturbate. This always makes me feel like I'm accidentally in a porn.
he was so drunk he doesn't remember anything. I have to break up with him all over again
Watching crazy stupid love and drinking alone isn't what I thought it was gonna be
Its TONS better. Expect a drunk dial at 11:54
He pointed at some girls and said "I'm gonna have sex with them girls over there", and disappeared.
First week back and I made to one class, its gonna be okay after all.
Drunk me has cost me a lot in cell phones...
I think his dick was bigger than his dog
She's takin more dicks this month than I have in my life by the sounds of it
ya I had reallllllly good sex last night too that will probably get me evicted
I have to hand it to her. In my heyday I took home the 'biggest shitshow of the night' award 9 times out of 10. But I passed the torch on to her last night, and she went skipping merrily far and away with it into the enchanted world of aggressive alcoholism. Is this 30?
Ok maybe second best. He dated a stripper. Can't compete with that level of hoeness
The report specifies "melted cheese food" as the cause of the burns. Your pride, like your cock, isn't getting out of this without heavy damage.
Randomize
