no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
I made out with four boys last night, AND EXCUSE ME WHILE I COUNT HOW MANY GIRLS.
Things he has used as lube on me: olive oil, cologne, purell, spit, tanning oil, and bottled hotel lotion
He needs to save up for some actual ky before my vagina gets an allergic reaction
epic walk of shame this morning involving 2 subway transfers. I need to start sexing locally.
i might have gotten away with it if "don't tase me bro!" wasn't the first thing i said when i rolled down my window.
PS Can you transmit a UTI to a sexual partner? I tried to ask, but the doctor just told me to abstain (sup Bristol) for my own good w/o answering
she was mad because i didn't remember our fuckaversary. fuck buddies are getting too demanding..
My phone really needs to stop auto correcting "library" to "ovary".
Apperanlty I was screaming "It's hard to swim with a broken ankle sir" and then tackled the lifeguard. The joys of blackouts
Dude, they are shaking the RV, yell at them. It feels like i'm being rocked to sleep, I don't like it, I'm not a baby.
The intern claims someone glued plastic eyeballs to his penis last night. He going to show everyone in the conference room at 3pm. There is a $5 cover charge.
Please stop letting me make out with hot lesbians.
Definitely not. I may be your best friend, but first and foremost I am a guy. Please continue.
I'm actually drinking gin and juice out of a floridas natural carton...so if that has any indication of how I'm doing
so in other words, they broke and fell off and I ate a gummy life saver off of his balls
Happy Father's Day to the first man I called Daddy while cumming.
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