Where are you?
In a non slutty way
Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
this girl walked outta his room as i was walkin in to scottys and i just say " time for the walk of shame baby! whoooo!". she ran away
No its cool, because I bought a handle of tequila earlier, in case things went south
whiskey dick. though we did manage to break my closet door and flood the bathroom.
You realize at the bar last night we blew on imaginary whistles like rose from titanic right?
Kyle found me outside his apartment in the hallway. Said he didn't hear me knock bt smelled alcohol through the door. I'm sucha bitch to my liver
You told your mom that it was your second day sober. I think she believed it until you jumped off the balcony
Swimming turned traumatic when grampas shorts slipped off..
we're forecasting high levels of inebriation into the evening with dropping temperatures late at night
what could you have possibly accomplished by watching 6 hours of a mythbusters marathon
well, i added sex in a wind tunnel to my bucket list
my face feels like mints and my body feels like tingles
I woke up to him watching me sleep and after I told him it was over he asked if we were still on for Vegas next weekend
Hot guy next to me on the flight lives near my grandparents. There’s a 100% chance I end up drunk and naked in his hot tub
Happy Thanksgiving to me!!!
He’s disease free and drives a Porsche. What else does a girl need?
Randomize
