you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
and by charming I mean he has a horse cock.
I'm timing the release of my poops to the sound of the machine gun from the video game he's playing in the living room.
just woke up with a thong on my face, dont remember going home with anyone and its way too big for it to be a good thing
Too late, the blunt's already in my cleavage
You two kept repeating the same thing over and over. It was like looking after retarded pull-string dolls.
Thanks for sticking it out with old horseface last night... I owe you one buddy.
My bruised ribs were so worth that win in beer pong
You know how I got mad at him for making out with his formal date? Apparently I fucked mine. I'm guessing any exclusivity is out of the question.
She just cut the six pack plastic up and screamed "save the dolphins"..she also threw away cans of tuna. I like this girl.
THAT FUCKER WASTED TWO OF MY COLORED CONDOMS! HE DIDN'T EVEN FUCKING FINISH IN IT HE JUST SLAPPED IT ON AND WASTED IT!
Copy that. Decided to shower with a beer in a glass bottle. Gotta stop the bleeding first. Be there is 20
You left something at the house but since I'm back home now so I can just mail it over. Address?
I didn't realize you could put dignity in a box these days.
i refuse to sex anyone who doesn't get my lord of the rings references. no exceptions.
My mom just said we can't get married in nude body suits to look like earthworms. She's ruining my life.
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