I boned her and wore a Freddy mask once. It was pretty lol
I KNOW you don't honestly think you can pay me back in lotto tickets.
well yea, now i know i won't get hair in my teeth...
this episode of spongebob makes me wish crabby patties were real
just took a shot of real whiskey... i forgot what it's like to drink liquor that costs more than twelve dollars.
They are making fun of natty and blackberries.
Tell them they are ugly.
i walked toward the cop car thinking it was the liquor store lights nd by that time it was too late to escape the trap
And we should impose a 'friends don't let friends order 25 shots at last call' rule
We made a trail of cheez balls so we knew how to get back to te apartment.
Let me shower first- i smell like sex and rock climbing (not so sure how that happened)
No more going to class sober.. Tried it for a day or two, its just not for me
Give me 20 minutes.. I'm going to need to start off with an orgasm to get through this day
You don't come back from leaving a bag of shit on someone's counter Jill
I never truly understood the phrase ball is life until I started having to balance NBA finals and all these men with balls i'd like to handle.
Just so we're clear, drunk and naked is not appropriate attire for Thanksgiving. Do it this year and Grandma will ban you for life.
Randomize
