i puked in the mini-firdge
we don't have a mini-fridge?
bought one. it ws too cheap to pass up. xcept now there's puke in it,,, but the freezer's fine so i feel pretty good about that
okay serious question, the water is shut off in your house, do you attempt and use the clean toilet water for your new bong?
Well, she opened the door to puke outside the car, but she threw it open so hard it popped back and hit her in the face.
You spilled spaghetti on the floor, and kept telling the noodles to "settle down" as you tried to clean it up
i drank out of my shoe...were you seriously expecting me to be the voice of reason?
Having a race with the dryer. Seeing who can get drunk/dry clothes faster.
I apologize for getting really drunk, taking off my shirt, bitching someone out, crying, and breaking something at your party next weekend...
He whinnies like a horse when he's cumming. I wish I would have known this before we got into a relationship.
If it's any consolation, I've been sitting in the hallway in assless chaps for the past thirty minutes
Hey, the point is, I have 3 guys to fuck to get over the last one. It's my golden rule. You told me to find a hobby! It translated as "find another guy".
That is the opposite way I told you to find a hobby.
The boat wouldn't start, so we brought it back to her house and we've been sitting in it in her driveway for the past 5 hours drinking beer and yelling at peoplee.
You tried to bite my nipple like 3 times
NAh son
Just general bites
I AM AT THE LOUNGE WHERE THEY FILMED THE LAP DANCE IN SHOWGIRLS....IT IS AMAZING
I'm sorry I pissed in your bedroom and then woke you up when I tried to jump off the balcony
PLEASE LET MY BIRD FUCK YOUR BIRD
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