He has been begging me for a Bj but doesnt want to get mono
How is he gunna get mono? is he gunna suck on his dick after you?
He tried to make an olympic torch by lighting a corona box on top of a pool cleaner.
They ran through the sprinklers in front of campus police, shirtless. Singing "love is a battlefield"
I wasn't trying to be rude when I hurriedly walked past you, but I can not put in to words exactly how bad I had to shit.
What wine did you feed Jack? Might not want to waste the good stuff on kitties. Kitties only get box wine.
She's crying about either her ex boyfriend, her one night stand, or her own puke. None of those is worth the tears.
Is it weird that I want to have sex wearing my glasses and lab coat while having an actual scientific discussion?
There would be some who claim I got a little "carried away" or that we "probably don't need that many jello shots". They would be wrong.
Jenna, I'm going to use all my homosexual powers to steal him from you
Austin, I will climb on top of your shoulders and slowly suffocate you with my vagina
My gynaecologist hit my g-spot today by accident and for some reason I went "at least someone found it" VERY AWKWARD
Well yes he stayed. He brought Guiness, them he shaved me. It's a long, but beautiful story.
I have no idea what those words in that order meant, but if you go to Florida send me pics of strippers
I took out the emergency phone in the elevator and replaced it with a bottle of vodka. The game is simple, do a shot for the number of the floor you're going to. Best suggestion box tip ever.
Like what? And no, shrooms cannot be party favors.
Woke up in a hotel room with some random guy then walked over a mile to the bus stop where I laid down and waited on the bus. GREAT NIGHT
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