Question: does he have any sense of self image? He looks slightly like he crawled out of the Euphrates after living as a fish for 20 years
If a video of someone that looks like me banging that chick on the hood of her car in some parking lot suddenly shows up on the web... let me know, I gotta see how that turned out.
I am downstairs in the bar now having a beer...actually I ordered two beers and placed one across from me in front of an open chair. I did this for appearance sake, so nobody knew I was double fisting all alone. I'm getting hungry now. I'm thinking of ordering two meals just to keep appearances up.
I'm at a nursing home getting weed. Lol when times are tough, things tend to get a lil weird
You can't spell "party" without "RA."
You know what else you can't spell it without? "Gonna get fired."
Sorry about flashing you in front of your mom.
You didn't say, "No." And you stole more than half of my Snickers. You owed me that dick.
i really need to shower, but i don't want to take off my bra and lose my cleavage. the struggle
Mom called last night while I was at the bar and asked where I was. I told her I was on the highway to the danger zone while the guys were humming the top gun theme.
There are horrible decisions in life and then there are tequila flavored moonshine decisions
i just passed i guy i once let listen to me masterbate on the phone...nyc is not big enough
Lol for real, I'm Kylie Jenner "this is my year of realizing things" right now
This is very awkward but where is my dildo, Mom
My life just got so pathetic that I volunteered to work a double on my day off because its saturday and I have nothing else planned
I’m home. Please don’t call me unless you have an arterial bleed or you’re on fire. Love you 😘
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