If a girl drunk dials you she's at least entertained the idea of sleeping w/ you correct?
YES
Maybe she got knocked up by accident. I still refuse to believe that anyone actually INTENTIONALLY gets pregnant.
I think he liked me better when I only opened my mouth to suck his dick.
if this hangover is indicative of how 2011 is gonna be, i want nothing to do with it
hey i found one of your nipple clamps under my couch, i miss you!
I'll be spending 4/20 on a cruise ship, so i need a babysitter to make sure I don't reenact Titanic
81 degrees in april.... Thinking margaritacicles, you in?
do we own a ladder
We do not.
then how am i on the roof
You're only allowed to hookup with one freshman a semester. MAKE IT COUNT.
Got my parents to pick me up from the party, take me to the bar and buy all my drinks, then drop me off at my booty calls house.
so I guess I made a note in my phone last night to remind myself not to do shrooms on the cruise ship
I'm pretty sure that our Lady and The Tramp Red Vine moment was the farthest I got last night
He has started theming his dick pics. I have one he sent his duck has a sombrero on. Another a Barbie is riding it.
I've got 3 hot dudes surrounding me. It's the Bermudick Triangle.
I'm eating animal crackers on my bed next to my vibrator writing about the hopelessness and depravity of humanity. I am LIVING.
Randomize
