I thought you should know that you passed out in your trash can last night.
Thanks for throwing up on me.
But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
He told me he looked up all the foods that make cum taste better and he put it all on his moms shopping list. she came through my line. this ones a keeper I think.
Can you get arrested or in trouble for punching a dead relative in a casket?
i pounded out a 17-yr-old on saturday night
no, that is not a typo
i turned her down on fri night, googled the state consent laws & then caved on saturday
we ended up on her 9 year old brothers bed and he saw the whole thing.... now he will know how to use his equipment
he matches the description of mystery hookup #2, 4, and 7
I'm pretty sure there was a language barrier but he knew what "harder" meant.
Not going outside. I may melt into a puddle of wine
It was a karaoke bar combined with a liquor store and had a donkey pen in the back.
Keeping it classy as usual I see
also, add "teaching boys to sext" to my charity work
Wow my largely unnecessary pool of lizard-related knowledge finally came in handy. Are you proud?
I don't know what to say
There can only be one screw up per family and I was here first. Get your shit together bro
Do not ever get that redhead chem major high. Gave her a magic brownie and she sat in a corner and literally cried about organic chem. Never again.
if I blackout nd am found tomorrow w butterfly hairclips on my nipples and my habd down my pants tell my family I am sorry
Randomize
