I found my old addy guy via fb who clearly understands the supply and demand curve of addy during finals so he's gonna hook me up.
after he came i started crying. just to fuck with his head.
After all you put him through, I think it was only right that you saluted the bartender when you left.
'Well you know, stuff happens' isn't really an excuse for sticking a cheeto in my ear
I've decided I'm going to drink again. More. Day drinking. Night drinking. Everything. It's the responsible thing to do since I'm not pregnant
But really- as the voice of your vagina I am BEGGING you to do it. If not for yourself than for your poor innocent puss
I had to puke in a ditch beside a cow pasture and like 50 cows just stood there and watched. I could feel the judgment.
I've somehow found myself in an emotionally abusive relationship with a married man who gives me drugs.
My life is quickly turning into a Lifetime movie.
FUCK and YOU. times 10. To infinity and beyond. You bastard. Worst. Cockblock. Ever. I'm going to nail your sister.
It was a good dick. I give credit where credit is due. A good dick deserves praise.
I'M HANGING OUT WITH THE DRUG DEALER UPSTAIRS JUST SO I CAN STEAL HIS WIFI PASSWORD, I HOPE Y'ALL LOVE ME.
You made me take you back to Mcdonalds so you could yell at the guy for not giving you enough ketchup packets
I vaguely recall french fries...
You then proceeded to call your mom and tell her you weren't coming home because you were "tripping balls"
Sweet...
She said if you lived here it would be like the x rated version of 3's company
got the runs at the club last night. wondering when it'll be safe to show my face again.
He sent me the milestone first dick pic this morning, it looked like a baby's fist holding a tree trunk. I'm frightened and aroused in equal measure.
Randomize
