I'm walking behind a man wearing a womans shirt, heels, mens pants and a baseball hat
He always grinds on me and is like "This is awesome because we're both Catholic!"
We've had the 'life would be so much better if we were both lesbians' conversation too much for that to be okay.
she has a picture of her daughter riding a giant rooster.. of course i want to make obscene cock jokes
So i forgot that my head is completely wrapped in gauze, and tried to do the "come hither" look. He think's i'm brain damaged
i dont know what was worse.. snorting the wasabi or puking on the neighbors dog
It's like a party bus, but there's a glass, airtight wall separating the driver from the passengers, and once everyone's on, they pump vaporized THC into the cabin.
I feel like his penis would have a weird haircut because he does.
The airport has the best people watching and munches... It should be a destination drinking location
I feel as if I need Plan B just being in the same room as them for more than 5 minutes.
Is there like a dick file on me? Guys can't hold two dicks anymore?! Who are you people????
Paige is home safe.
Actually, she's here now, punching me in the face. You should've kept her keys.
he fell asleep naked and all I'm doing is staring at his weird balls
I think my sex life is about to turn into a war on two fronts
I don't know what it is about this quarantine, but I have never written this much smutty fanfic in my life and I am loving it!
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