dude your cousin who was wearing the skirt wasn't wearing any underwear
gross she's a slut
yea she doesn't shave either
if being creepy is wrong, then i don't want to be right
I heard Topanga got a DUI. I need that mugshot asap.
Vanillla milkshakes are the new Gold Bond. Will explain later.
just skyped with my friend to listen in on the people talking shit about me in the library. creepy or strategic?
how was your day?
fuck the small talk. are you bringing the liquor tonight or am i?
as it turns out, there is no "i was in the pool" excuse for adderall-induced shrinkage.
He got arrested in front of the church last night. Looks like we need to find a new location for the wedding.
Now that we both have boys can we make up games that objectify them as sex toys?
holy fuck that shirt looks so good on him, it was like he was born with it on. that shirt deserves a blow
I was talking to another guy at the bar last night and all of a sudden a flying piece of Sausage lands on my boobs. Then I hear my boyfriend yell, "just marking my territory."
The last thing I remember was riding in a grocery cart with two strangers while a cop pushed us
My roommate is fucking his gf in the shower and i really have to pee do i just bust in or pee on his bed
Now we just need to figure out why your underwear was in your bra
she prefaced telling me she was pregnant with "houston, we have a problem"
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