I'm skeptical of all drag queens.
The worst part was when my mom got more drunk than anyone else and started doing the Time Warp.
I lost of the blow last night. Found it later in my bag labeled Fairy Dust.
ol I'll be okay, it's only a christmas party so the worst that could happen is I end up playing madden naked again
just got super drunk mixing jägermeister with my lyme disease meds. even if my face goes paralyzed, at least i got smashed from it.
he said something along the lines of "fish can smell fear"
Apparently all year they've been using me as a standard of drunkenness
I showed him my toy collection and he goes, "You won't need those anymore," and dropped his pants. I threw the House of Pleasure out last night.
Your dick is going to fall off. Be careful or you'll get callouses. A workingman's dick.
I saw the attitude and didn't even try. Line of the night from one guy who talked with them for a while said, "I don't meet you standards. I have a job and would treat you well." She was blank faced.
It's 4:30 AM and I just walked through a line of 10 deer without them freaking out. I am the campus deer king.
I'm not snubbing your weed I just had a really important rack of ribs to get home to
You were licking skittles to check if they were "halucinateizers" so no, you are not leaving the house while on antibiotics.
R.I.P my virginity. TOD 12:37pm
In other news there's 12 shirtless Korean dudes all trying to jump on a tiny little trampoline so that's entertaining
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