Ugh I just know that when I take off his pants his underwear will have Megan's Law written all over them.
Update: no underwear. Greeeeen light.
He had one of those small greek statue penises
Just ran into my ex in the WOMENS bathroom. He said I did this to him. Swore he never wore my clothes but said he liked my skirt. I need vodka.
I got it! After our exam we take shots for every question we skipped!!!
I don't wanna die...
can you pick up eggs and chocolate sauce on your way home?
what kind of party is this?
the best kind ever
I may have just googled Muppet Treasure Island drinking game
We saw a kid playing in poison ivy. We walked away, he'll learn his lesson.
shes 19, drunk and said she has no gag reflex. im trying to decide if i have scruples
you dont
i dont
I don't remember anything past "we have 15 minutes to drink this keg."
My roommates just built a mini golf course upstairs while I was sleeping.
I had sex with marker all over my face so I can do just about anything.
He got hit with a horseshoe, set on fire, fell out of a tree, and puked all over the side of his car, all before midnight. Everclear.
I'm surprised I don't have a permanent face imprint between my boobs.
Painting strippers breast and vaginas to look like easter eggs. What r u doing tonight.
On a brighter more disgusting note...... I think I just shart myself but I'm too afraid to find out.
Randomize
