Fist pumping is hard when country music is playing FYI but I am committed
We were making out and then he stopped and said to me, "Your ship is right there, why don't you take your people and just go?"
Drinking wine out of an empty soup can and watching spongebob squarepants.. I eveb hate myself
I really think we need to get on this Charlie Sheen bandwagon
also bought condoms to give away to people who look like they're about to make a bad halloween decision. I'm like a fairy.
Well besides you comparing him to your dead cat, I'd say it was fine.
its 4am. im standing over him in my bed eating chinese food, on the phone with dan trying to convince him to break up with his gf. whoredom.
Dude best one night stand i woke she was cleaning our fridge while waiting for the cab to show
Watermelon juice. Makes everything better. Gin. Wine. EVERYTHING.
It's fun yes. But hard on the body. I woke up with her purse, socks and one of her shoes in my room. The other shoe was outside. What the fuck were we doing last night?
How would your parents feel if we installed a sex swing?
This whole quitting my bad habits all at once is really messing with my ability to function.
I'm so sorry to hear about your grandmother. Also how many grams are in an eighth?
I gave her the last ten dollars to my name and bitch comes back with a six pack of bud light and a pack of sour patch kids
He made me pay for half of dinner. Fucking feminist revolution.
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