i want to bang the Snorg tees girl.. shes always smiling ;)
I forgot to tell you. I'm at a porno shoot today.
I convinced her san diego was a state. all the proof I needed was saying, why do they call it san diego state university?
i think i just heard my dad finish in the other room...
I mixed the ketchup wit the mustard in one bottle to save time making hotdogs
you hid your keys in a box of lucky charms because drunk you was apparently going to eat them for breakfast...
Like. There is beer on the other side of that door and 6 yards in. If he's not back in 20 minutes to let me in, I am using this tree as a battering ram.
he definitely had sex before you were fully potty trained.
You told me you had two boobs that want to be naked for me. I'm just following up on your request.
Hey I was just wondering if you could go look for my teeth?
I AM NOT LOSING TO SOME FICTIONAL CROSSDRESSER
Did you ever think you lost your bong and then you find it in the weirdest place? I mean, who leaves their bong in the shower?
I've got a tequila scented hand sanitizer for you.
you're the best roommate i could ever have.
A world without bacon flavored condoms is not one I want to live in.
Does the girl you just banged want anything from Taco Bell?
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