I want to take things slow emotionally, but fast physically
The walls in my apartment are so thin that sometimes when I fart, I stop to listen if people are laughing next door.
Sorry I couldn't answer your call, I'm expecting a call from Chris Hansen.
I'm guessing you didn't end up going to the bar last night.
Nope. Ended up at what I believe was a slumber party down the street.
Speaking of morons, I just found half a Subway sandwich in the bathroom drawer You or your brother?
He is going to sleep with me. That's all there is to it. I'm 4 for 4 right now. I'm not making it 4 for 5.
I made popcorn. Partly so the room doesn't smell like sex, and partly to apologize for the things you saw when you walked in...
I promise a much better performance tomorrow than last night my penis has a bed time
Fuck morning classes and our weekday drinking habits.
No. Cease was criminally insane from birthday shots, and not a lot of women want to go home from the bar with a guy who wants to "snuggle but keep it strictly professional".
I just fucked her in her boyfriends bathroom... he was in the room sleeping.
i just remember sliding through the snow and yelling i love america before puking on the oncoming cars
Reading an example in the GRE study book referencing Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles while wearing TMNT pajamas. *airfist*
omg please tell me you're eating pizza right now too.
we need to find a way to be drinking champagne 24/7
I think I puked in the middle of sex last night if that's any indication as to how drunk I was.
Lol, yeah it'll be fun,but will it be cereal and dick pics fun?
Randomize
