on a scale of one to ten, how awkward would it i told him i had to go change my tampon and then left?
11
im about as happy as oj after his trial
my affection for youporn is starting to get disturbing... i just thought about sending them a christmas card
lets make a pact to never make a pregnancy pact
I just spent all my babysitting money on red cups and beer.
People still let you watch their kids?
What's the point of having 3 fuck buddies when their periods all seem to sync up
He was waring a speedo fashioned out of american flag bandanas and when he got hard he said "you're such a patriot...raising the american flag like that"
I'm at a party with half naked strippers driving in a little kids battery powered mustang around a stipper pole in his bedroom
I broke stuart's oven and showed up to the party with a squirrel.
You were in your third change of clothes, and I found you in my driveway passed out with my dog's food bowl. You win.
I'm still hoping for it dude. Random north dakota pussy. If my 16 year old self knew that these were my dreams he would so try to beat me up, and i think he could.
What's the address and code again...does anyone need anything and why is my viking helmet on the bed?
It's like she fell out of an MTV reality show and no one knows how to send her back
Passing out drunk in my therapists lobby may not be the best way to confirm my "stability"
I WAS KIDDING ABOUT SLUTEMBER BUT ITS ACTUALLY HAPPENING
Randomize
