Should I have kids to fix a relationship??
She made me go with her to get a pregnancy test since she's missed a few birth control pills. She made me park in the "expectant mothers" spot at CVS and preceded to ask if it would be in the pest control section.
she sounds like chewbacca in bed
i am positive it's ok to drink. it's just pieces of the plastic knife i forgot was in the blender.
Don't tell me wow. Tell me this is normal for college and in no way am I a whore.
The fact that I pulled something plastic out of my mouth after taking that shot is starting to concern me.
Me and my vagina aren't speaking at the moment.
I went to grab his drink and my hand grazed his dick. It was magical.
You called me 32 times last night just to tell me you felt a heartbeat in your vagina?
Don't send the creepy guy a picture of your penis. That's my Christmas wish
A nap. You broke your hand napping in Vegas.
This is the guy I made out with and it made me think of my dad. Let's never talk about it again.
Dollars spent: $83, Girls kissed: 4, Girls slept with:2, Girls currently making me breakfast: 1, Fucks given: 0
Of course he's seen my tits, I wave those things around like a trump supporter does an American flag
You ran full speed into the glass door with your Patron and yelled "FEEL THE RHYTHM, FEEL THE RHYME"
Randomize
