Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
I feel uncomfortable when she gargles my jizz.
Obama just said the words "we're all in this together." I wanted to start singing high school musical
Just whacked off in the middle of writing a paper, gave me great ideas. Note, should do this more often.
I have absolutely nothing sober to say to you.
This wouldn't happen so much if fat girls would just stop being so damn easy.
Just so we're on the same page, we cannot have been the first people to have ever thought about shooting that guy with crossbow
Ummm I just broke my no puke streak at church
Some guy just showed up at my door to return my bikini top. EXPLAIN NOW
I got a message from the hook up gods today that it's time to move on. It came in the form of me being shoved in a closet naked and stuck in there for 30 min well he watched boy meets world with his brother.
How was it playing wingman?
I feel like I was rockys coach watching him get the shit beaten out of him by Apollo creed
Currently on my Sunday walk of shame. Should I go to church?
Definitely ended up doing Coke with Chewbacca in the porta potty behind the haunted house.
He's a drill sergeant! The sadomasochist in me can't resist that.
You win. I am a lesbian who maybe slightly jaded. I didn't mean to throw the knife at you head.
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