quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
So bad night, ended up beating off to porn and eating Keebler elf cookies.... at the same time :-(
it turns out vodka filled condoms arent that funny
they ran out of cups so I just drank out of a cowbell.
Y do pigs give u trufles on farmville? I WANT BACON YOU FUCKING PIG!
my mom just informed me that im way nicer when im high and offered to supply my weed until our house guests leave.
does that include her cleaning your bowl?
professor came back from spring break missing a tooth
I would not wish his dick upon my worst enemy
His IQ level must rival that of a comatosed aardvark.
Welcome to stoned Saturday. Full of laser tag and beyonce and awesome
Fuck these runners passing me on campus as I'm waking to dinner. With my huggie. With flavored vodka and rum. Aka yum
At what part of the night did you guys leave?
After my hot tub cannonball.
Why was I drunk tweeting incorrect Beyonce lyrics last night?
Just let me suck your dick and be happy. Let me have this.
This should be illegal
It is
I mean more illegal... I shouldn't have this
Randomize
