i just woke up and its 10 o'clock and the words "Robbies Fave Restraunt" and written in sharpie above my vage. Help me.
I just sold my mom a dimebag. Should I feel scared or sucessful?
It took my four years to get this degree, and 4 hours to lose it, My parents are not impressed.
this year's halloween challenge: make audrey hepburn go from classy to slutty drunk
Why is the word 'best' written on my chest?!!
I have the slightest memory of swinging a bag full of condoms over my head...
Katelyn drunkenly ripped the soap dispenser off the wall so we decided to call it quits
Okay. thanks for sacraficing your body and risking aids for our snowcone business.
Good because ass is like 60% of my diet now
All you kept saying was, " Barack fucking Obama. FUCK Michelle" and then you motorboated me.
Walking in on a gay threesome, with a girl in the corner watching and taking vid is a reason to not only knock, but to never go to Savannah.
Well, I'm hung over and my penis hurts - two signs of success
When Pitbull's songs sum up your life... you know it's time for some serious life changes.
Just ate Panda Express. Fortune cookie had no fortune in it. I actually prefer this. Less broken dream potential.
I'm just happy stripping was the reason you fractured your hand
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