oh no, I think we did it in the 'front asshole'
Don't you ever say "drinking at 2" as if it's a bad thing again. I'm asking you as a friend here.
You rubbing siracha on a cat with your feet is the opposite of what I want.
Fuck your 100 proof Hot Damn. Do you know what 100 proof vomit tastes like? Anger.
By the way. I expect to test the theory of you running a mile drunk for memorial day.
We just took back to back grav bong hits and are playing battleship. She guessed Z - 12 so weve switched board games.
At one point, he came in to give her a pep talk, and then after he left, she just kept whispering his name into the toilet between heaves.
My dick pics could make it to the popular page on Instagram.
I do NOT want to date a man who has no interest in going to a kangaroo farm
THEN YOU WILL NOT GET TO SEE MY TITS TONIGHT OR IN THE NEAR FUTURE YOU HEARTLESS BASTARD
Dude, she set my Tinder preference to men, set the radius to 100 miles, and used up all of my right swipes. I think she's mad.
going on fb and having 11 notifications all from you is absolutely horrifying
SOME DUDE PUT OUT FOR A MCCHICKEN AND YET YOU STILL WON'T FUCK ME
Found her grinding on my boss with her tongue down her throat last night. Guess who just got promoted!
Because talking after sexting is equivalent to cuddling after sex
Randomize
