I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
Let's just say there is a bloody hand print above my bed and it's not mine. Literally.
ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
Instead of centeral air we are getting a margaritaville machine. Thought you would enjoy our logic
I kept feeling my boobs..just to make sure they were still there.
Can't a girl send out a 4 pm booty call anymore
Second day of summer classes and i already got this girl to send me nudes during class
that is WHY your in summer classes
worth it
New level of stoned. My Terry's Chocolate Orange didn't 'whack-and-unwrap' so I ate it like an apple.
Sometimes you just have to have sex for a Netflix password.
HOLY SHIT. I JUST FOUND OUT THAT THE KARL/RORY BASEBALL FIGHT THAT RORY LOST WAS 2 YEARS AGO TODAY. RIP KARL'S DICK.
You declared that afternoon sex will be referred to as "wet naps" from now on
I named my Roomba after my pot dealer. I have a problem, don't i?
I'm seriously considering selling my books back early. I don't use them anyways and I could really use the beer money..
Everyone else's "needs" are getting in the way of my alcoholism.
Did u puke in a church parking lot? And go to the wrong funeral yesterday? Lol
Randomize
