I'm gonna start referring to my vag as my ladygarden
Hey its bob the builder. Where did you go?
If i die in the snow, get to my laptop and delete all of the nickelback. password is "barry"
as in "white"?
Slugs feel like vagina... thought you would want to know
I felt so bad for you. Drunk Rachael wanted nothing more than to crawl into the cop car and give you a hug. Luckily Mollied/Barred out Rachael convinced Drunk Rachael this was a terrible idea. So I ran. I have your keys btw
I inadvertently smoked 6 blunts at one time. We just kept passing them around...I didn't know what happened until it was over. I can't walk.
i know you're at the dentist, but this dick pic was too phenominal to wait and i deserve immediate tit compensation
Remember don't think of it as being an alcoholic until something bad happens.
Think of it as Mythbusters for people who say you're going to get arrested or die
Every single person in NY is either baking, drinking, or photographing their cat. Reporting live from Instagram.
I just changed all my morning alarms to wake me up with different Jesse McCartney songs telling me I'm beautiful. Would you believe I'll be 25 this year?
How do you nicely stand up a date that you're skipping for a 3sum
Hey, you should go to your facebook ASAP... i'm guessing you're wasted but you just uploaded a picture of someones dick...and everyones taking bets now if its Rick or Mikes..
Listen all we did was not even pretend we aren’t each other’s type and live together and constantly encourage each other to get laid for 6 months.
Idk how it devolved into us fucking.
Oral stamina is what keeps life exciting
Sadly my Summer of Cocks is coming to an end
Randomize
