Aj just asked if we were going to the bulldog tonight..i told her no because of the expense and tests coming up..but mostly because i don't want herpes
Is it weird i consider You Sexy Thing our song?
ol I'll be okay, it's only a christmas party so the worst that could happen is I end up playing madden naked again
Houston, we have a problem
where are u?
Houston. That's the problem. I don't know how I got here.
Just passed a guy passed out on a riding lawn mower in his front yard.
there's a guy looking for his pants in my room, is he yours?
threw up on my 7.30 AM placement test. Never again
From now on, you must never doubt my ability to go from drunken rambling lovesick girl to Stepford wife within the course of a few hours.
I really hope you didn't eat the bowl of melted vanilla ice cream I left on the coffee table. Because it is not melted vanilla ice cream.
MY GOD DAMN TV STOPS WORKING EVERY TIME I AM THIS FUCKING HIGH. WHY MUST IT TORMENT ME?!
Woke up on my sisters couch, and it was like the start of a Terminator movie,my brother in law was passed out on the floor naked in the fetal position. We now call him Arnold. It was an epic night.
I'm gonna go parent style on your ass... I don't ask much from you but if you could please just come get shitfaced with me I would really appreciate it
He is saved in her phone as Sir. Mindfuck <3/ vag cleaner of course I need to meet him.
By the way, you totally deserve "i got a job sex".
My cat is sitting in the window watching the neighbor's dogs doing it. I think she's lonely too.
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