we have to go try and show our tits so we can get ID-free drinks at applebees
Now would be a good time to set your alarm to pick me up from jail in the morning.
i do not condone bathtub ky wrestling
I woke up to ritz crackers on the lawn, a keystone behind the hedge and puke on the rental car... i think that we have become that house...
Its that time of week again, Bad life decision wednesday
Just blew a perc off the traytable on my flight, spring break has begun!!
i licked icing off his dick. in front of his sister.
he suggested we do it doggy style cuz it was his dead dogs birthday...i had to do it
my heart is telling me chinese, but my head is telling me beer.
If you have shit your pants within the past two years, please take a seat.
I can't feel my clothes. I'm convinced I'm naked
It's like the bat signal. He only texts me when I'm naked.
the people in front of me have a grocery cart in their car... i missed college...
This may be the most redneck thing I've ever said, but I know all there is to know about farting dogs
It’s a 10 inch dick! Of course I’m getting a Brazilian
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