My Higher Power is John Stamos
They say you shouldnt they say its no good for the environment in your vagina
I just saw the Donald Trump of homeless quys walking down the street. He had three shopping carts and a bike.
It sucks..Now I'm depressed because appearence wise, she's the closest to my favorite pornstar I'll ever get..
When I woke up in the parking lot today I decided it is not a good idea to hang out with you anymore.
Congratulations, you have helped solved the mysterious disapperance of Dani's phone which was found in the munchies cabinet next to the oreos. Your reward is star power as well as a fat ass bowl of Nebula. You may proceed through the wardrobe and into Narnia for your prize.
He really thought ahead and just left the tequila in the mail box for late night pickup. Best. Friend. Ever.
Are we in any of the areas with tornados?
Dude, i don't even have pants on yet, it's too early to think about tornadoes.
I saw this news story about two naked Satanists being arrested so I thought I should ask if you need bail money or pants
come over we're fb stalking guys who were dressed as bananas last night because i can't remember which one i blew
I hope the lord has blessed you with many tampons, child.
I walked past his mum on the way out and she offered me toast in a napkin "for my travels". Being home from uni is weird.
Come on, what straight woman, gay man, or bi person HASN'T scrolled through Justin Trudeau pictures after a bad day?
..needless to say, i got fired. But I'm in the parking lot tanning on top of your car... so its not all bad.
Let's say we can see the evolution of our "relation" by his name in my phone. Pizza slice emoticone. Pizza guy. Jordan. Jo. Jackhammer Pizza Guy. Jockhammer pizza guy.
Randomize
