these two guys are about to go shot for shot with syrup
now he is talking to a potato
He won't talk to me. He'll only communicate using scissors
she came to the game with a camelback filled with booze. except it was only the bag part so she duct taped to her back
I woke up to blood crusted on my face. I don't understand
team rage. no explanation necessary
I admit it's going to be hard to top a limo orgy and Mcnuggets....but I have faith in you
I just did a Kegel and my back popped. My vagina is a gift to penises everywhere.
THAT IS NOT SOMETHING YOU TELL SOMEBODY THE FIRST TIME YOU MEET THEM IN THE DARK.
I made a Russian puke. I outdrank a Russian. I am unstoppable.
I met a bunch of Germans and said in german "this is for the fatherland" and poured a beer on my head
Dick sucking on arrival? or would you like to cash that in later?
So his roommate walked in on us, went upstairs to tell her bf she has found a new use for the rafters & they must try it.
What eyeshadow color says "yes I am at the dentist, and yes I am hungover please don't judge my life choices"
Don't know how your birthday has been, but mine has involved Hershey's syrup and a blowie. It's safe to say you're playing catch up.
Seriously I'm not after your cock. It's a nice bonus, like finding $20 in the dryer, but not the reason I hang out with you.
Are you done yet? I've eaten three corndogs so I'm ready 2 party.
Randomize
