he asked me to marry him on one of those scrolling message belt buckels.... what now?
so I ended up banging her last night
dude I remember her. You sure it was a her?
i don't even remember
so I made out with a lobbyist last night. im officially a resident of D.C
Awkward moment #23: reasuring mom that the bf and I aren't having sex as seamen is running down my leg...
A picture just appeared on facebook. I am puking in the toilet, you are next to me puking in the sink. I think we have our christmas card.
Dude, you need to come clean your dates vomit off the ceiling. What in the hell were you guys doing?!
there is a video of me on Facebook getting mad at a trash bin what the fuck was in your Pepsi
It's okay. I've dumbed down my notes over the semester because I knew I wouldn't be up to understanding things come finals.
Saw a girl outside my apartment shotgun a bud light, then a red bull, get in her Tahoe, and drive 4 people away. Gotta love thirsty Thursday.
Got too starbucks. 3out of the 4 girls working i have ducked and haven't ever called. My coffee has dick written on it. It may contain spit by pumpkin lattes are only once a year
Idk I wanna make it till midnight but I also want tequila
I just swiped right for a guy on Tinder solely because it looked like he was holding Zoboomafoo
I woke up in a bush somewhere in Tucson with a full suit on. Great way to end my birthday.
Having to do the walk of shame on crutches was defiently a first for me. cheers to the governor, klove
He asked me how many starwars references he could make before i no longer find him attractive.
Randomize
