I'm drinking ghetto ass mojitos!
Wow. How can mojitos be ghetto?
Squirt + bacardi limon + limes = ghetto mojitos
i feel like the song jizz in my pants was made for him.
she said she missed her period, but is going to six flags... think im safe?
waiting in line for my ID. the kid in front of me reaks of hopes and dreams and hornyness-- freshmen by calvin klein
do you ever think like no deep thought could take place in the spanish language? like all they talk about is like tacos?
how high are you?
Got a basket, 50 condoms, some candy, 100 plastic eggs & my bunny costume. Campus will feel my wrath in 2 weeks
I AM OVULATING LIKE A STEAM ENGINE.
We were in the hot tub...he ate the pizza pocket directly out of my mouth
It was one of those "wake up holding a random metal flower" kind of nights.
She's opening her family birthday cards at the bar. So we can pay our tab. Bitches wrote checks :(
I'm horny too so maybe we will both recap our regrets on Sunday
So what your saying is I can use her desperation to my advantage. Fuck, this must be how pretty girls feel.
He's gonna turn my vagina into the Sahara desert
it was awkward when he was taking off my clothes and i had to help him undo my fanny pack
I need to bang the neighbor boy. He’s given three women screaming orgasms this week alone.
Also, my apartment walls are too thin
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