Boobs. All I remember is boobs.
all you did was keep googling "what time is it" over and over and over
my hot student got the clitoris wrong on the lab practical...so it kinda makes me not want to pursue it
just because he can't find it on a cat, doesn't mean he can't find it on you
For future reference, the words 'big' and 'problem' should be used sparingly with a person whom you have recently had copious amounts of unprotected sex
I don't know what possessed you to do that, but you have to give the stripper more money before you try to check her oil or they are going to throw us out every time you do that.
You kno how some people just need a "everything will be alright" pat on the back? I need an "everything will be alright" blowjob right now. Come over
He just told me what he wants for his birthday. "a noise complaint" he also said he wants to be the cause of all the noise but he won't be the one making the noise.
Idk I somehow continue to get laid by pulling my dick out and reciting the 3 world country orphan kid commercials
Could have had sex with an ex NFL kicker last night.
That would've been embarrassing.
If I had a dollar for every straight boy that questioned their sexuality because of me, I would live a comfortable middle-class life.
You haven't demanded nudes today. You alright?
he made me cum so hard i had an asthma attack
And how about the fact that the first time i really truly looked at a guy's dick was in my car. MY CAR. GODDAMNIT!!!
THEY'RE HAVING SEX ON A HORSE AND THE HORSE DOESN'T EVEN CARE.
I just saw a guy in a zippo shirt buy 2 gallons of fire starter fluid and then proceed to smoke a cigarette. I feel like hes got some big plans for his tuesday.
Randomize
