I would do things to you that would get us burned at the stake if we lived in a puritan village.
If you really hate me that much, you need to stop letting me put my penis inside of you. It sends the wrong message.
Since when is my name a synonym for head?
Yeah, we spent most of the evening making fun of the drunk girl until we realized it was you.
I'm pretty sure this all started when I found a vibrator in my mom's sock drawer and had my first orgasm when I was ten...
she is like cheap alcohol. you can only get so buzzed before you get sick.
Wait til she sees the pic of her vag in court docs.
if that blanket by the dog bowl was your dog's "bed" then i apologize to bailey for having sex on it
dude. you ripped the mardi gras beads off the girls neck and yelled she didnt deserve them..
God if that man would just have sex with me every time I got mad life would be so much easier...
I'm actually kinda upset that we didn't consider velcro-ing detachable capes to our clothes before this moment.
Sam was like the mother fucking Moses of drunk and underage kids and he lead them to safety away from the cops. He's a hero that we deserve.
he said he was going to fuck me like a rabbit in heat. What he should have said was faster then a train and over before a commercial
He just blew a .079. Jesus loves him THAT much.
Just had the biggest masturbatory crisis ever.
What does that mean?
Internet is down.
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