Skip Greektown and come to Geektown. I just want to cuddle.
She told me a very interesting story, complete with pantomimes, about how she got a habanero seed in her vag
so let's talk penis.
I puked in the AC vent. thing are gonna get ugly come summertime.
I would give up sex for lent, but I think Jesus would understand that I went too long without it to go back now.
Just a heads up: The party is Fourth of July themed. Spread the word
dude its may
Work with me here, man.
I know its only noon but, Im too drunk to hold this baby...
Dont judge me. He may have been ugly but he was INCREDIBLE. He's like the Susan Boyle of sex.
I've only left my bed to pee and eat nutella out of the jar with my fingers
I have an excuse to be a whore in Mexico. I'm conducting an experiment to see if small dicks are caused by the poor drinking water.
He jumped into a mall fountain. I don't think that warrants a lifetime ban or the disorderly persons charge, but whatever. Fuck you Pennsylvania.
So what other shows do you masturbate to? Or is it just friends
Well 1) stay calm 2) stay safe 3) drink more
Like sorry your dick won’t suck itself?
Just a heads up that Dad just brought home a new Porsche and the sales girl he bought it from.
Umm okay. What are they doing?
They’re in the hot tub
Can I get divorced when I grow up?
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