i swear i just saw perry the platypus. the fuck dude. i shouldnt even know who that is
chipotle is closed for thanksgiving... I am officially thankful for NOTHING.
I don't remember what your face looks like..
I don't remember your face either, just your dick.
i realized our last day of finals is on cinco de mayo....it's god's way of saying drink ridiculous amounts of tequila and wear sombreros
We always say that. And then its 4am and someone is screaming at strippers.
peeing off your aunts pourch into the koy pond seemed like a good idea at the time
the bar told me i would have to take an hour break so they could wash the shot glasses
the beer staff turned into a beer spear way to quickly
I will be sticking my dick in something this weekend. You can either be that something or not. Your decision.
Saw the guy I once slept with, he was buying Beer and shit tone of diapers. Glad to see how 2016 will turn out.
final thoughts: i just want someone into choking me out, weed and anime
Getting paid in weed to watch a pregnant adult with cooking skills is the TITS
Dude my toilet did not deserve what I just did to it
You've been inside me, dude. There's no such thing as TMI.
anything below 65° is too cold to be naked on a roof
Randomize
