Well for one thing, she was eating rice with a shot glass.
Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write
We woke up in an inflatable kiddie pool full of both empty and full beer cans. In the middle of his dad's office. Oh, and we were locked in. Nobody remembers.
He made fire alarm noises before throwing up all over the street.
There are apples in the microwave and a cup of twigs in the fridge. I think she's hiding in the pantry, I can hear her giggling. Leaving her to it.
Please say a prayer for the elevator people at work today. My farts are significantly more potent the day after hitting that korean place for lunch...
No one understands the complete and utter debilitating 3 day bday bender.
is telling someone you can be his trophy wife the same as proposing?
And somehow i feel like your expectations will turn out to be illegal in some way.
I need a pedicure
You need to go to planned parenthood
DUDE NEVER CALL THE COPS BACK
i feel like every weekend turns into a giant blur of i dont want to know...
Dude. Craziest ride ever. I was convinced that the bus was an airplane. There were clouds when I looked out the window. I got really upset every time the bus turned because airplanes shouldn't turn.
Security showed up because apparently we were fucking too loud.
As your roommate I can attest that y'all do indeed fuck rather loudly
Sexual Dilemma - Covid Edition: Flirting with a cute frat boy. The Cougar in me wants to go back to his frat house and fuck his cocky brains out. The adult in me doesn’t want to get Covid and have to quarantine in a frat house for 2 weeks\n
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