Hahahhahaha! Oooh get it! Ugh I am so dead but if I go to the lib whuich I will hopefully b havung sex instead, ill hit u up
ARI BLEW A 2.0 HAHAHAHAHAHHAHH THESE COPS ARE SO COOL!!!!
I boned her and wore a Freddy mask once. It was pretty lol
As a matter of fact my bong is named Hulkamania brother
you left your shoes but remembered to take your vodka. i see where your priorities are.
So, we're going at it on the sink when a German kid walks in and starts brushing his teeth. I love hostel sex.
I just did the math. 30.36% of girls I've slept with have cheated on a significant other while doing it.
He had a curved dick....must be a european thing
He only talks to me during the summer and it's probably because I let him fuck me in my pool last year.
She basically needs a man who will never act up and take all of her shit
I'm even having trouble finding a guy who's taller than me with no unibrow.. someone needs to tell her its time to lower her standards
You're telling me you've never sent a picture of your cock to a girl and then were all like "Oops, sorry, wrong person! By the way...You like?"
She was mad I came so fast. I was like, It's the Olympics! Fastest time wins! We can train you in the offseason.
Even blacked out me knows not to sleep with socks on
Ultimate fat girl moment: I promised him my mouth for the night if he bought me a funnel cake..
He makes furniture for a living and is basically a hot, younger Ron Swanson
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