Yay Minnesota! I can't believe there's now a US Senator who has taken more acid than we have
That glade motion activator thing keeps going off every time we pass the bong. I don't know what I'm getting high off right now.
Breaking hearts and overdosing on semen. That's my life.
He just told me that he goes squirrel hunting. NO LONGER BANGABLE.
Idea for the cake. Joints for candles. Do it.
we've had our differences but let's set them aside, go home and fuck
Either you got hacked or we need to have a serious discussion about sending penis enlargement emails to your straight friends and why you shouldn't. It sends the wrong message.
I'm sitting here bra-less eating jalepeno candied bacon. You know you want this.
Coming.
Snow days are when you really appreciate that your neighbor is on your bang roster.
I immediately woke up from my nap, made myself a screwdriver and got in the shower. I know it's spring break but I'm still questioning my life choices.
Slept with the roommate last night and also discovered that she believes in eugenics. I may need to slow down my drinking
you're welcome to come here, except my beds from ikea so it's more unstable than i am
Facebook is for cat videos and having better lives than people from high school, period.
I love standing in line at rite aid for 10 minutes being forced to talk to my ex's mom about life while I'm holding nothing but yeast infection cream
Eh, my puke tasted like lemonade, so not too bad
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