Nevermine. I'm just going to tell you on Myspace with a glitter graphic.
Let's bang like we're on a Lifetime Channel movie.
i dunno what you eat but your cum is all over my underwear and it smells like pretzels
I've decided I'm just gonna keep drinking til the baby bump shows...
We should make a goal to do one active thing a day, even if its like throwing a ball
And by ball i mean playing catch. Beer pong does not count as an activity
The last thing I remember is him grabbing my ass and telling me he knew where the jello shots were, so I followed him.
Gong!
YOU'RE MARRIED NOW YOU CAN'T KEEP GONGING ME WHEN YOU GET LAID IT DOESN'T COUNT
Apparently she saw two women get in a slapping match over a comforter at target yesterday. She said it was awesome. Clearly I take after her.
Crying in the liquor store is not a good look
THIS ISN'T WORKING THIS IS THE DRUNK LEADING THE DRUNK
I took the weekend off because he and I were supposed to go to Vegas for our anniversary and get a hooker remember?
Ah, yes. Who says romance is dead?
I just shit my pants and had a heart attack. Simultaneously. May or may not be related to this game.
I don't know his last name, but he's in phone as Pat the conqueror.
Are you playing pokemon in the dark and sexting? I can't be mad at that.
She said she didn't care that I was gay and wants to ride the fucking rainbow
Randomize
