Herpes is a lot like Arnold Schwartzenneger. Because it always comes back. Also, because it is usually in some way in control of California.
What can I expect? While all of my friends are getting married, all of his friends are tripping on robitussin
I'm seriously so bored I'm seeing how many rooms I can masturbate in before I get caught.
Four. Poor grandma...
you started crying about dinosaurs being extinct
that's why i woke up holding that dina girls hand
she's a dina-saur
aw he's cute...not in a i wanna rip his clothes off way more of a put him in my pocket and keep him as a pet
And occasionally lick whipped cream off them abs
Exactly.
Where is my rescue team. I keep hiding shit. And I'm trying to give out shots of olive oil
You told them to let you give him stitches claiming you were a certified nurse because you've taken plant biology classes
Just the amount of girls he locked himself in my room woth says your gonna have to take a cab bro. I don't think he's going anywhere
Yeah. Still not happy that my prof saw a picture of my vag.
he just fluffed my hair and told me I had to dance with him because we were both gingers.
Fly, little bird! Repopulate the ginger race!
i was asked to be gay of honor by three different girls and NONE of the groomsmen at any of the weddings is open to experimenting. i mean whats the point then.
I left the office with a vacuum, 2 condoms and 300 dollars cash money. Tell me I don't have the most versatile job on the planet.
I never said it was inaccurate, I said I hate you.
I mean go ahead and let your freak flag fly but if you could not fly it in my bed that would be great
I found my parents stash of sex toys. You know my green one? My mom has it...in purple. I HAVE THE SAME VIBRATOR AS MY MOTHER
Randomize
