Because of no shave november, it's no boys december... pay back
As of tonight I have officially had sex during every Disney movie.
im pretty sure thats the first step to being a pedafile
You brought back some girl with you at 3am and introduced her to everyone as "hot pocket"
Please fuck him. And then let me tell her. And then let me protect you from the knife she pulls from her Ed Hardy purse. Please.
Just called my mom. She definitely saw all those fb statuses so thanks for that.
Haha did she know what fisting meant?
Yeah. Which is upsetting in itself
After we finished he asked if I knew if it was a boy or girl. Diet. Starts. Now.
she kept peeing on everything and yelling it was now her property.
i shall enjoy my approximately 2 hours of being sober today
You should see the damage i did to the apartment last night. So many broken things and butter sticks stuck to windows.No memorys
Whatever. He's going to tie me up tonight whether he wants to or not.
all i know is that i listed him in my phone as 'vagina cookies.' that can only be a good thing.
Jazzercise themed birthday pub crawl. 6 bars in 6 hours.everyone was a hot mess.
I just dried my bra with your hair straightener because the drier is broken again.
woke up. showered n got ready. had sex. and was still 15 minutes early to work... its gonna be a good day!
He couldn’t find my clit with a map. Literally. I drew him a map.
Randomize
