is it bad if i hope guys are like edward cullen and can read my mind. i could be a whore in disguise.
I went for the touchdown every play, and I think I ended up with herpes.
True friendship; bangin a girl to get ur friends hat back
a guy tried paying for lapdances with cds, who uses those anymore?
You don't have to believe me. My vagina knows it happened.
Lesbian sex in an alleyway drunk.
The guy in the American Flag bikini was telling the women he was disgusted at the amount of alcohol they weren't drinking. Then it got ridiculous.
i still can't believe we survived that barcrawl. the third bar had bullet holes and we still went in.
You used the best tools you had at your disposal.
Slutty, slutty tools.
I look like one classy bitch running in heels through my backyard while carrying a small dog and a large bottle of booze. How am I still single?
Seems like you've kicked summer 2012 off well.
She's crying about either her ex boyfriend, her one night stand, or her own puke. None of those is worth the tears.
Just please try not to piss Danny off, I really can't afford to find a new drug dealer again
My early Valentine's Day one night stand just took an uber home. Thank you, technology, for letting me enjoy this day in peace. 😍
I'm so drunk I forgot what to do to go pee.
This is going to be so stupid, but do you feel the calluses on my hands when I give you a handy?
Randomize
