idk hes just been lookin at me weird all night
he probably just wants to cut your skin off and wear you like a body suit
So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
new number. flushed my phone last night when i puked, made B help me look for it for 2 hours.
How do I tell my mom that she just went to the gym with my water bottle filled with vodka...
I'll throw in a blow job for your kind ways. Or another booty call. I'm poor and not very imaginative. This is all I have to offer- the unicorn like wonders of my vagina.
Woke up with his dick on the side of my face, it's like he passed out mid-mushroom stamp.
Just saw you drinking out of a flask on national tv. I've never been more proud of you
I said you have to fuck the german guy and take one for the team...it's a once in a lifetime opportunity you know.
The boys wrestled in the living room for the last condom while the girls chanted, "THE LAST MELON."
Everyone was soo nice and genuine.. Then again it coulda just been the drugs.
I know this is a weird question but we both had pants on when my mom woke us up last night right?
I have need of you to return home with haste, as I require the magical capsules you possess to relieve the posterior pain I am living. I battle this demon with stubborn grit, however I feel that defeat is on the horizon.
I managed all three standard threesome configurations a female-bodied person can achieve in just under nine years. I want to high-five everyone involved, but I've lost touch with a couple of them
Everytime after he came, he'd laugh uncontrolably for ten mintutes. He was sober..
You went after him with a sword while screaming “FAJITAS!”. And Todd was dressed as a Goth for some reason
Randomize
