You and i never got to the, we dont care what we look like friend-stage. you know? like not brushing your teeth stage.
sorry im really high
it was a mass text i'm sorry
do you usually send 'hey sexy' as a mass text?
im pretty sure one of the guys i was dancing with at graffiti wrote on my back "you rock". now feel like a danced with a 5 year old.
Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
Is it sad that when she told me he has a small peen I felt like it made us more compatible?
I just snuked. Sneezed and puked
Whoever said that a man can only cum up to 8 times a day is a fucking liar...or was never on adderall
My vagina hasn't been this smooth since I was 8. I better get laid tonight.
New swimming pool is best sex toy ever. We are pioneering the doggie-style paddle.
Why do I have peacock feathers super glued to my body?
Judging by the amount of alcohol multiplied by the amount of her exes here, tonight will be ending in tears.
We made it a contest to fuck on everything in your room while you were on vacation.
There's a fried egg and an empty bottle of reddiwhip in the parking lot. Did you have fun last night?
The secret to finals week is to have an orgasm for every point you need on the test before you take it.
But Keith is doing MDMA for New Years and he's 39.
Keith has a beautiful 20 year old girlfriend, a good job and a cute puppy. We can't all be Keith.
But I want to be Keith.
Randomize
