are you still at the devil's house?
whats up tonight?
Ice cream, wine, and teabags... Not the earl grey kind
she's throwing things again.. almost stabbed herself in the eye with a fork.
Just found out my 21st birthday is on a Wednesday. The possibilities are cheap, as well as endless.
she's doing key bumps of parmesean cheese
Well then. It seems like we have a Mexican standoff of genitals
mind if i send you a dick pic? so you can see what she wasn't doing right?
Seeing the pictures of him and i, I'm giving whiskey the win on this one. Definitely had beer goggles.
You know when you get a stripper pays your bail. You got good wood.
I'd be 10x more excited if going out didn't require pants or the general giving of fucks
He literally wrote out a schedule. On it, there's a taco break, and a spot where I start crying.
It was like we had a conversation with our eyes.
Was it a good conversation?
It was an awkward, sexual conversation.
do you think the dildo I'm bringing through airport security is considered a weapon?
I need two food groups: booze and turkey sandwiches
After sex he brought chocolates and said he loves RuPaul's Drag Race. How many points does he score for that?
Randomize
