Operation extremely regretful is in full effect
I don't apprectiate you insinuating that my breasts have a sort of bremuda triangle effect
who knew getting puke in ur hair could make it look so cute and curly. minus the crusty puke part
It was honestly like finding a clitoris in a haystack.
Went to an open-bar law school party and puked in front of Justice Scalia. My legal career is now complete -- I literally got judged by a U.S. Supreme Court Justice. Can't get any higher than that.
That chick went from zero to shitshow in only 6 shots.
You disappeared for 10 minutes. Then came back with nothing but your boxers and a life jacket on to tell us we were all screwed when the flood came and you would be the only survivor.
We had sex during an intermission, then the second period. The bruins better win. Missing a period isn't worth having sex with him
Dont judge the spank bank, just be happy that you were deposited there.
I sent him a tit pic on accident and he replied with "nice ass"
I want to get up and tell you that smells delicious but I'm struggling with the idea of pants
And then my night got REAL pukey
your keys are upstairs on the nightstand or I put them in the hole in the wall
She fucked the dishwasher AND the manager.
Well, she isn't a classist. You've got to give her that.
Just boned her on my desk. on top of my term paper. take that professor dipshit
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