p.s. this guy just tipped me with ecstasy pills. is this real life
this morning my mom told me to get a new vibrator because mine was too loud last night
i fell asleep watchin iron chef that was the blender she heard. i dont even own a vibrator
its like they have never seen someone walk through campus with a plunger
dpoing straight shots of jhameson. boys are imp ressed. i apologize
Keep in mind that he's 43, unemployed and living with his parents. There's really not much we could do to make his life worse.
It's so cute when the exchange student uses "blowjob" as a verb.
and then he publicly announced her herpes on facebook.
I only wish the guy being lead around by his cock at the drag show was the weirdest part of my night.
I haven't found him passed out in the living room covered in noodles for a while now so I guess he's getting better with the drinking.
Some guy thought i was the waitress and handed me his credit card. drinks on me.
Planning a foam party. Swimsuits are mandatory, and please no granny suits. If you wear a granny suit I will stick you in the corner and put a cone hat on your head.
To the point, I hope I remember where to put my dick when I finally get laid again
You have a 50 50 chance
Went to go look for a friend that was missing since 3am, found her passed out in the hallway of the apartment, guessing it was a good night
He forgot how to sit. we had to pick him up and set him down.
just had sex in a stairwell with six feet five inches worth of drama
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