people should stop making movies, we'll never top bio-dome.
My "High Times" magazine came in today, as well as my girlfriend's new sex toys. We're calling in sick today.
i forgot beer had calories. that would explain alot.
In a world where you don't want your phone to pocket dial your parents at 2 in the morning while you're running around Florida shitfaced, Droid does.
Land Before Time marathon. we drink every time littlefoot almost eats a treestar.
did you really just send me an instagramed dick pic?
Go big or go home. i snuck in two beers in my bra. im here to win.
I feel bad for his balls. Ive never seen so much sperm. He had to be dying
They just keep looking funny at me. No one has attempted to tell me that I don't make sense though so maybe they're all way more high than I am.
I remember grabbing your ass. So firm. So right. I don't regret it.
I made a joke about The Hemingway being a really boring sex position where you blandly describe all the action and then kill yourself after you orgasm. He stopped responding. I've GOT to stop talking to everyone like they're you.
It's not above me to sleep with him solely for his authentic budweiser shirt
I woke up in an ill fitting childs tutu this morning and the shower curtain is knocked down. Wtf happened?
There it is. Caramel-coated dick. Someone is getting a yeast infection later.
walk of shame across osu's campus on game day. i can see all the spots i threw up last night. its like my personal yellow brick road.
Randomize
