Google if cops ever smoke weeds and then bust them. I need to know immidiately.
You know, sometimes I seriously doubt your commitment to sparkle motion.
i was like the pretty and slutty 8th grade girl who goes to a party, gets wasted, and ends up having sex with a senoir
details?
alcohol + bed + penis = sex
And then he told me he had the vodka, but he was still in line at WIC for the juice.
You stayed up for three hours wasted, feeding my rabbit 2 1/2 boxes of girl scout cookies.
It's the foolproof way to identify who didn't get laid last night
Is my lip ring still in your hair?
It's pitch dark except for the glow sticks, someone turned the heat up as high as it would go and the bathroom is flooded. Also think I just stepped on someone's face.
How could you give up sex for lent? I gave up religion for lent years ago and never looked back. Or give up civility, not sex.
after she rolled over and said 'i'm so glad you're like my gay best friend, love you' then left. did i just get friendzoned AFTER sex??
It'd probably just be a lot of profanity and hyperventilation and deteriorating into tears anyways
so just a regular conversation then
I feel like it went downhill once I decided we should take $100 tequila shots.. oops lol
There's a baby in the strip club. I say again: THERE'S A BABY IN THE STRIP CLUB
Should I go bust a nut on the beach
PokemonGo as navigation to get some at 5:13 AM. Life choices, yo.
Randomize
